


Just Because You Want To

by Gorgeous_Girl_Genius



Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Acceptance, Fluff, Includes some kinky cum-fetish based dialogue in the form of a text message, Kink acceptance, Kissing, M/M, Sex Positive, not otherwise smutty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-15
Updated: 2019-11-15
Packaged: 2021-01-31 03:08:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,444
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21439219
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gorgeous_Girl_Genius/pseuds/Gorgeous_Girl_Genius
Summary: Remember back in the late 2000's when texts weren't organized into message threads, but into an inbox and outbox? Remember how incredibly easy this made it to reply to the wrong text message?What if fanon Pre-game Shuichi was Shuichi Saihara's kinky online roleplay persona? What if Shuichi exchanged numbers with his online contact? What if Kokichi's last message to him was sitting in his inbox just waiting to be responded to?
Relationships: Oma Kokichi/Saihara Shuichi
Comments: 6
Kudos: 118





	Just Because You Want To

_[1/3] First, I’m going to track you down. No matter where you are, I will find you. I’m going to tie you to my bed, each limb separately, and I’m going to keep you _

_[2/3] that way. You’ll be there forever. I’ll cum in you and on you and I’ll keep you cumming constantly. I’m gonna fill you with so much cum that you can’t belong _

_[3/3] to anyone else. Every day, any time I want, I’ll cum inside you. Just because I want to._

Kokichi blinked down at his phone. He had two thoughts fighting for dominance inside his head. The first was simply “HOT”. The text pressed nearly all of his kink buttons, almost eerie how neatly it did so. His next thought was overwhelming, wordless confusion. Where on earth was this thought from his beloved Shuichi coming from? Surely it made no sense for him to be texting him something like this. 

Shuichi hadn’t heard back from his RP partner for a while. It was unusual. Had he not said he would text tonight? Was his friend busy? Or did he say something wrong? Shuichi had been RPing with this partner, a boy he only knew as “Xx_Use_Me_xX” for a few weeks now, and they’d been through a larger number of complete roleplays than he’d like to admit. He was used to how things worked with him, or at least he thought he’d been. Shuichi thought everything he’d sent was within the same lines as the things they had already been doing. But maybe he was wrong. Maybe he’d said something just too gross? He flipped his phone open and opened the outbox. 

No. No. Shuichi’s heart jumped to his throat, and then promptly stopped beating. His chest heated up and the heat spread to his face, pulling tears to his eyes when it reached them. His stomach turned over, suddenly filling with nausea. He didn’t. He couldn’t have. He absolutely couldn't have done this. But it was unmistakable, in the field for the recipient, where there should be a string of numbers for his faceless, online only contact, there was a name instead. “Kokichi” 

_Im so so sorry Kokichi, I swear to god I didnt mean to send that to you. _

_That was for someone else I messed up._

_I’m sorry. _

_Oh god Im sorry please believe me it wasnt for you. _

Okay, now that made sense to Kokichi. The text had come out of nowhere because it wasn't meant for him. But, even understanding that, Kokichi was now left with the question of how to handle it. He bit his thumbnail. Shuichi had already proven to Kokichi that he found the whole situation to be mortifying. The question was, how could he make Shuichi feel comfortable again, how could he let him know that he was accepted? Shuichi was a delicate balance. If Kokichi pushed him too hard by being too silly, Shuichi would feel like he was being mean to him and he’d break, but if he was too genuine, Shuichi would take it as an indication that the situation was serious enough to warrant Kokichi changing his presentation, and he’d break. Kokichi would have to tread extremely carefully to play the right role in a way that would actually show Shuichi how he felt. 

_Awww, so my beloved sh’ichi-chan doesn’t want to tie me to the bed and cover me in cum to make me his? I’m so disappointed! I’d love to be all yours, sh’ichi-chan. ~Oh, and that’s not a lie at all. _

Shuichi’s heart had started beating again, but now elected to do so directly into both of his ears, pouding, thudding, drowning out all other sounds and most of his thoughts. And his face, if he didn’t do something about it, it would burn itself out of existence. Leave it to Kokichi to react like that. The pounding in his ears was at the perfect rhythm to interrupt every thought he had. Kokichi wants? _thud _Kokichi knows about _thud_ I’m so _thud. _ His fingers shook when he tapped the keys on his phone. They slipped onto other keys or off of the ones he was supposed to tap. He didn’t bother with any punctuation. He just tried his best. 

_I wovldnt havd semt thdt to u outof th blue_

Kokichi giggled. He couldn't help it. Even though his heart was breaking for Shuichi, that text made it so obvious that he was out of his normal headspace that it couldn’t not be funny. Shuichi was always so careful about his text messages, perfect punctuation, clear spelling, no text shortcuts. But this one, Kokichi could almost not even decipher.

_How considerate of my beloved Shuichi. Of course you’d never bother me, huh? Well, now I know. Now it’s not out of the blue anymore. You know I like it now._

Shuichi had been lying on his side in bed, letting the tears slip out of his eyes and over his face, holding his phone, pressing the up and down buttons on the navigation key to keep the home screen awake, the anticipation for the next message unbearable. When the message did show up, he could barely read it, but the “I like it” caught his attention. That just… wasn’t possible. 

_You can’t. There’s no way. You’re a liar. _

Kokichi frowned at his phone. It was true that he was a liar, but he’d thought his Shuichi would read between the lines. He always seemed to. It was important to tell the right lies, focus his attention in the right places when he responded to Shuichi. Truthfully, nothing Kokichi had said was even actually a lie this time, but in his heart, he meant to tell Shuichi that he was good and that he accepted him, Kinks and all. He’d been a little more forthcoming in telling him flat out that he wasn’t lying, but he’d kept the tone light, the focus on flirting and showing his own interest, to keep Shuichi at ease. But Shuichi seemed too out of sorts to do any of his normal detective work. It was alarming. He’d have to be even more genuine. This would require a more blunt, delicate touch. 

_I am a liar, but I’m telling the truth right now. _

Shuichi couldn’t breathe. His body was hot, so hot he could still barely think. His chest was tight and his heart was still pounding,hurting with the tension of each beat against the tightness. Kokichi wasn’t telling the truth. He could tell. Kokichi absolutely had to be lying, because he was the only real person who wanted things like that. Sure, there were other people online, but that was different. They were faceless, nameless too, as long as you didn’t count things like “Xx_Use_Me_xX” as a name. They weren’t kids who lived in his town, who he saw in real life at school every day. He didn’t know why Kokichi was playing like this. Maybe Kokichi was trying to be nice to him, or maybe it was just to torture him, in his own, innocent, mischevous way. 

_I know you’re not. Just stop please. _

That did it, Kokichi decided. This was just not possible to handle over text messages. He hopped out of bed, and left his house, texting once more as he ran down the side of the road. 

_Okay, Shuichi-chan. Let’s talk in person. See you soon!_

In person? Those words didn’t make sense to Shuichi. His brain had been scrambled, still cooling off from the shame, and he traced the outline of the number keys on his phone with his fingers. Kokichi couldn’t possibly mean he was coming to his house. It was late, his parents were asleep. There was just no way, right? 

Shuichi stifled a startled scream when a sudden series of taps at his window interrupted him. Sure enough, there was Kokichi, on the roof over the garage, tapping on his second story window, grinning ear to ear. Shuichi stood up, cleaning the tears off of his face with his hands and unlatched his window. Kokichi immediately crawled in, not making a sound. This might as well happen. 

Shuichi looked like hell, Kokichi thought, as he dusted himself off to stand up from the floor. All of his visible skin, starting from his hairline and continuing down past the neck of his T-Shirt was bright red. His eyes were puffy and he was shaking. Even though he was looking right at him, he was looking past him, not really seeing him. Kokichi thought if he touched him, he might shatter. And Shuichi didn’t move at all, didn’t make any comment on how weird this was, didn’t invite him in, or to sit down, he just stood in the middle of his own room, staring down at Kokichi. 

Shuichi couldn’t move. He’d let Kokichi in his room, but he had no idea what Kokichi could possibly want to happen now. He could see that Kokichi was nervous, bouncing on his heels, twirling his fingers through his hair, only keeping his eyes still, clearly focused on Shuichi’s own face. Why was he so nervous? And why couldn’t Shuichi tell why? He was used to being able to decode Kokichi without even trying. Did anything in the world make sense anymore? He supposed his inability to understand any of this must be his punishment, punishment for being so fucked up, punishment for being so careless as to send irrefutable evidence of being so fucked up directly to someone he knew in real life, punishment for creating his twisted internet identity, punishment for indulging it with roleplays, punishment for making connections with people for the exclusive purpose of indulging it. 

“Shuichi-chan?” Kokichi ventured, softly as possible. 

“Yeah?” Shuichi’s voice wavered, nearly cracking. He didn’t meet Kokichi’s eyes, instead keeping his own eyes flitting around rapidly from one thing to another, first Kokichi’s bouncing feet, then his hands in his hair, then his posture, and the set of his lips. 

Kokichi sighed. There was no way Shuichi was going to be able to pay attention to him like this. Here, in person, Kokichi could see way more that this was a bigger deal to Shuichi than he’d thought possible. He’d known that Shuichi was too upset to handle this via text, sure, but this was on a whole different level. Shuichi didn’t even seem present, like behind his eyes, there was nothing, like he was barely there, not processing anything, floating separate from himself. With Shuichi like this, how in the world could Kokichi ever get through to him?

Kokichi hummed his thought. He needed to shock Shuichi, to snap him back to being able to think. He needed to do something drastic, and he now thought he knew what it was. It was a risk, a big one but one he felt he had to take. He stepped in closer to Shuichi, then closer, coming up just underneath him. 

“Look at me, Shuichi” Kokichi was so close. So close Shuichi couldn’t really see anything of him other than the top of his head. Shuichi obeyed, at this point, just grateful that the onus wouldn’t be on him to decide what makes sense. Kokichi stared into his eyes and Shuichi watched him take a breath. 

“I love you. All of you.” Kokichi said, and then suddenly he was on his tiptoes, touching his lips to Shuichi’s. Shuichi didn’t close his eyes. Neither did Kokichi. They kept their eyes locked together, Kokichi using all of his effort to communicate his honest and genuine love and Shuichi unable to communicate anything except his bewilderment. When Kokichi didn’t pull away, Shuichi found his arms winding around Kokichi’s back, pulling him in closer. Strangely, still, neither of them broke the awkward eye contact. 

Finally Shuichi broke the kiss, putting Kokichi back on his feet. Kokichi smiled. There he was, his precious, beloved Shuichi, grounded again in his own body, actually seeing him.

Shuichi blushed again. Kokichi had kissed him. Just like that, like it was nothing, he’d kissed him. He felt real again. Could that mean… well, anything? Could it mean Kokichi wasn’t mad? That he still liked him? It felt like it could, but Shuichi was afraid to hold out any hope.

“Shuichi, I want you to listen to me, and I want you to know, I’m not lying at all when I say this, okay?” 

Shuichi blinked. He was thinking more clearly than he had since this all started. And thinking clearly, could he ever believe that? Could Kokichi ever be completely honest with him? More importantly, if he was, could Shuichi ever know for sure? He nodded, regardless, to get Kokichi to continue. 

“There’s nothing wrong with you. I love you. Just the way you are. I know you didn’t mean to send that text to me. And I _do_ like the idea, but that’s beside the point. The point is, Shuichi, you’re good. This doesn’t change anything.” 

“Kokichi…” A fresh batch of tears stung at Shuichi’s eyes before pouring down his cheeks. “No, god, you saw that text. I’m fucked up.” 

“Yeah, I saw it. So you’re kinky. You like weird sex,” Kokichi shrugged, “doesn’t everyone?”

“No! Everyone definitely doesn’t!” Shuichi objected. He was crying now, without his permission. Maybe he could believe Kokichi was honest, that Kokichi loved him, loved him in spite of his weird, creepy interests but he couldn’t believe Kokichi was _right_. 

“Hmm, sooo, there’s you, there’s me, the cum-soaked cock sleeve who I spend most of my time calling dirty names, Kiyo, of course, and that’s just what I can name off the top of my head. Sounds like a lot to me!” Shuichi laughed through his tears. 

“That’s not the same.” he shook his head. Miu and Korekiyo were different from him. Allowed to be weird. Afforded tolerance from him. Not like him. They were loud and proud, or at least bold and unashamed, if not particularly loud. He was quiet, soft, and shy at his best. There was no way he could get away with being as weird as Miu or Kiyo, and whether or not Kokichi was telling the truth was, as always, a question left up in the air. Shuichi bit his lip. 

“Hey, don’t get lost again, Shuichi-chaaan! If you do, I just might have to kiss you all over again!” To Kokichi’s great relief, this made Shuichi laugh. He wasn’t gone, but he was deep in his head, transparently thinking of all the reasons that his kinks weren’t as acceptable as anyone else’s, of all of the ways he could hate himself while accepting everyone else. What could Kokichi do to pull him out of this?

“I mean,” Shuichi finally managed the power of speech to answer Kokichi. “The stuff they like is _weird_ but it’s not, like… this weird, and besides, they can, I dunno, pull it off?” 

It was Kokichi’s turn to laugh. 

“You seriously think that filthy disgusting cum dumpster can ‘pull off’ her kinks?” When his laugh died, Kokichi turned tentatively more serious. “Most people hate her for it, you know. If anything, being able to keep it to yourself - well, mostly - means you’re ‘pulling it off’ way better than she ever could.” 

“Not, like that. It’s different. I’m _gross_. I mean, it, I’m so gross. Sure, if you ignore the details, you can lie to me, you can tell me it’s okay, that it’s not disgusting, but it is. And I’m disgusting enough to _like_ it!!”

“Okay, have it your way,” Kokichi seceded “It’s gross. It’s disgusting. It’s dirty and sinful and absolutely filthy.” 

Shuichi blinked, trying to stutter something. He’d been arguing for this position all along, but he’d never expected Kokichi to just agree with him, matter-of-factly. It felt somehow hollow, but before he could speak, Kokichi held up a hand to stop him. 

“And it’s okay to be gross, and disgusting and dirty and sinful and filthy and every other word you can think of. You’re not _hurting_ anybody. Well, no one who doesn’t like it, anyway. So it’s okay. You’re allowed to be gross.” 

Tears, having never really stopped flowing, flooded back to Shuichi’s eyes in a rush. “I wish I could believe you, Kokichi. But it’s not the same. You can say it’s okay to be gross all you want as long as you gloss over what it actually _means_, but you can’t just, like, see the things I... “ Shuichi gulped. See, He could barely even bring himself to _say_ words for such a simple, normal part of sexuality, but after a pause, the pressure of his self-hatred managed to force it out, barely above a whisper “get off to, or you’d have to see how they’re just bad!” 

The idea popped into Kokichi’s head, a lightbulb popping on like in a cartoon. Shuichi’s problem was that Kokichi’s acceptance felt too far removed. It wasn’t direct enough. The solution for that should be easy enough. Kokichi pulled out his phone and opened his inbox, pulling up the messages from Shuichi. 

“Listen to this!” Kokichi exclaimed before he began. Shuichi looked up at him, obviously exhausted. Poor Shuichi. He was so full of anxiety. Kokichi hoped this idea would work. 

“First,” Kokichi started, keeping his voice light, a little playful, but not quite silly “I’m going to track you down. No matter where you are, I will find you.” 

Shuichi felt like his heart was going to stop again. He fidgeted with the fabric of his shirt near it. Kokichi couldn’t be doing this could he? 

“Kokichi…” He tried to begin, but the power of speech was too much. 

“That’s hot, Shuichi-chan…” Kokichi ignored Shuichi’s futile attempt at an objection, and batted his eyelashes. “I don’t think you know how badly I want you to catch me. Catch me, catch me, catch me!” He dove into Shuichi’s bed, giggling as he bounced to a stop. 

“I’m going to tie you to my bed, each limb separately, and I’m going to keep you that way.” Kokichi then switched to moaning his approval. “God, I wanna be tied to your bed!” 

Shuichi blused deeper. He couldn’t be hearing this, could he? He couldn’t believe his ears. Kokichi was reading out his accidental text directly to him, line by line, and approving, unambiguously of each one, one at a time. 

“I’ll cum in you and on you and I’ll keep you cumming constantly. I’m gonna fill you with so much cum that you can’t belong to anyone else.” Kokichi’s voice was now getting breathy, and he barely had to act at all. He tilted his head down, looking up through his eyelashes at Shuichi, who looked like he could faint, but had a smile spreading across his face in spite of his tears. 

“Please Shuichi! I wanna be your cum toy. Cum in me, cum on me, leave me cumming all over myself all day. That’s so hot. You’re so good for wanting it, Shuichi. I only hope you want it with me.” 

Shuichi stepped cautiously closer to his own bed, and sat down beside Kokichi. He buried his face in his hands, wiping tears from his eyes. This was too good to be real. It was fucked up that he thought this was so good. But could Kokichi really be right? 

“Every day, any time I want, I’ll cum inside you.” Kokichi read out, laying down, wriggling so his head was in Shuichi’s lap. He grabbed Shuichi’s hand and put it into his own hair. Shuichi was melting. Kokichi was reading him back his own words. No ambiguity, no glossing over the reality of what he’d said. Embracing every last word Shuichi had texted him. He pulled his fingers cautiously through Kokichi’s hair. 

“Just Because I want to,” Kokichi continued, then he flipped his phone closed and turned his eyes up to meet Shuichi’s. 

“You’re perfect, Shuichi. That’s not a lie at all.” 

“Really?” Kokichi nodded, shifting into Shuichi’s hand, winding its way through his hair. 

“I really would like you to send that to me on purpose some time, Shuichi.” 

“Really?” Shuichi repeated. He worried about repeating himself, but it wasn’t something he could help. He needed to hear it again, and if he just kept asking, he thought maybe he could believe it. He wanted to believe it. And Kokichi knew him, understood him. He reached his hands up to Shuichi’s face, one hand on each cheek. He planted another kiss on Shuichi’s lips.

“Let’s do it, Shuichi. Use me. I love it. It’s good. You can do it. Just because you want to.” 


End file.
